Fingernails — Useless?
You may recall a term from high school biology: vestigial.
The…
- Appendix
- Earlobes
- Coccyx or “tailbone” (the tail end of the spine jutting out over your butt)
- Wisdom Teeth
- Tonsils
…all are vestigial. That is, you don’t need ‘em. They’re evolutionary leftovers.Add the fingernail to that list. The fingernail on an ape or monkey may seem pretty useful — you can use it to pry open a banana or pick a bug out your parters’ hair and eat it. But for humans, fingernails don’t serve much purpose, at least not in our modern, post-Wooly Mammoth, post-Saber Tooth Tiger society.
But just because there’s no evolutionary reason for the fingernail to be, doesn’t mean the fingernail can’t be used. Like they always say — if you’ve got ‘em, smoke ‘em! Er… that is, use ‘em!
Here’s a short list of uses for fingernails:
- Classical guitar plectrum (aka “pick”) — along with well-callused finger pads
- Symbol of feminine sexuality — especially when painted fire-engine red
- When grown very long — Totem signifying high social status
- Lever to pry things open (scotch tape, band aids, etc.)
- A convenient focal point for a compulsive finger picking habit
