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Success Stories - tell us how you kicked the finger picking habit
(15 posts)-
Posted 1 year ago #
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Hi - nice site.
I'm actually doing pretty well the last few months. I have had 2 relapses but I've found a certain mindset that lets me stop it - and control the thoughts that lead to it. I feel great but am cautious.
Posted 1 year ago # -
I'm a classical guitarist and I found that after picking up the instrument after years and growing and grooming my right hand nails - which you have to do to play classical - I'm not picking anymore! Picking my left hand mangles my right hand nails, and picking the cuticles or nails on my right hand obviously messes them up for my guitar playing. It also helps me distract by grooming my nails whenever I have the urge to pick. So - I'm a bit compulsive now with the filing and buffing - but that's better than picking them!
Posted 1 year ago # -
Rubbing my finger on an eraser keeps me from ripping my skin off at work. Sometimes at home too - but there are too many other tools (nail clippers, knives) at home to keep me from picking. My toes are picked as well. Bupropion really helped when I was on it. I wasn't on it for this reason, but I did notice I stopped picking and actually grew fingernails while I was on it.
Posted 1 year ago # -
What kind of drug is Bupropion? I've never heard of it
Posted 1 year ago # -
Bupropion is the generic name for Welbutrin, it's an anti-depressant, but not an SSRI.
Posted 1 year ago # -
Looks good I might try it.
BTW - I'm a toe picker too. I LOL-ed when I read the page about doing yoga to help w/picking:
http://www.fingerfreak.com/treatments-for-finger-picking/natural/practicing-yoga
Its when I do those floor exercises that I pick my toes most! lol
Posted 1 year ago # -
i'm a finger/toe-picker....so f**ed up, but i go for my toes when i think my fingers need a break....or like maybe no one will notice my toes. then i'm depressed when i can't get a mani or a pedicure...right now, my toes are healthy enough that i could get a pedi, but my fingers are in horrible shape. worst ever, possibly.
Posted 11 months ago # -
Oh wow...figures I'd find this website only after FINALLY stopping a 25-year biting & picking habit about a month ago! *sigh*
Maybe some of the things I did will help someone else, though. I never realized there was a name for what I called my "nervous habit". I'm a 38 year old woman and both sides of my family all have nice looking natural nails that easily grow long. My dad broke me of the habit of biting my fingernails when I was about 7, but I went from that straight to biting and picking the skin around them instead. My mom always grew her nails out and kept them manicured, so she taught me how to take care of them but I never managed to stop the cuticle biting and picking. I always had raw spots, swelling, thick skin and spots I tore at until they bled.
But I've always been hooked on nail polish too. Right now I'm sitting at a table that wouldn't look out of place in a nail salon, 40+ colors of polish, a bunch of different files and scissors, brushes, etc. I always have polish on. I'm a cashier and people are always looking at my hands. Whenever someone asked me about whatever polish I'm wearing I kept saying to myself, "My nails look nice, but the raw places I've chewed look horrible. I've GOT to quit this!"
I started taking more time to care for the skin around my nails instead of ignoring it and focusing only on the nails and polish. Here's what they look like right now, tonight.
Right hand:
http://s179.photobucket.com/albums/w304/dooflotchie/?action=view¤t=P1010142.jpgLeft hand:
http://s179.photobucket.com/albums/w304/dooflotchie/?action=view¤t=P1010138.jpgSorry the pics are not that great, I need a better camera!
Things that helped me:
- Start out by paying more attention to your cuticles, meaning use things to help them heal, no matter how bad they might look now. Lotion and cuticle oil help A LOT! Use one or the other every day. Put it on as often as you can, it will hydrate the skin and soften it, plus they taste bad so you will have a reminder to keep your fingers out of your mouth. Massaging lotion or oil into your fingertips will also let you fulfill the need to keep your fingers busy without doing more damage.- Learn the necessary steps for doing your own manicure and nail care and get some basic tools for it if you don't already have them. I'm not saying you have to go to beauty school, but make sure you can keep your fingertips and nails in good shape and save the expense of going to a salon for the routine stuff. Going through the ritual of trimming, filing and/or buffing and polishing forms good habits and takes up some time you might otherwise spend picking or biting.
- You'll still have hangnails, broken or chipped nails from time to time. Make it a habit to *NEVER EVER* use your teeth for fixing any of those things no matter what. Nip off dead skin with small scissors or nail clippers. File rough spots off if they don't need clipping, an emery board will help smooth skin too. Keep these things handy wherever you can so you can resist the temptation to bite off any bits that are annoying you. This might sound completely nuts, but in the absence of anything like a nail file or sandpaper I have scraped my nails on concrete, a rock or a brick to smooth a chipped or broken nail. It isn't the best thing but it will do in a pinch.
- Small cuts or scratches on your fingers can be patched up with super glue. Really, no joke! I hate putting band-aids on my fingers so I glue them right away. It will sting a little but it seals up the wound and keeps it clean plus once it dries it's like an instant scab. It tastes bad, too, so it will help you keep from biting at it. The glue is naturally pushed out from a healing wound so it will come off eventually. Hospitals glue cuts and incisions all the time, it is not unsafe for you to do it yourself.
- Paint your nails! Even if they are short, do it anyway. If they look nice it will help you resist the urge to bite. Wear lighter colors on short nails if you don't want to draw attention to them, it is for you to enjoy and benefit from anyway. You don't have to spend a lot of time or money on it, there are lots of inexpensive polishes out there that dry fast and are easy to use. Guys, use clear polish if you can bring yourself to do it...there are even clear matte polishes you can use if you don't want shiny nails. The point is to make yourself keep them as clean and smooth as possible. The time you take to do some maintenance can be a way of redirecting the urge to pick and bite.
- Don't be too harsh on yourself if you have a relapse. A compulsive biting habit isn't formed in a single day, week, month or year and it won't be broken right away either. Fix the damage as best you can and move on. Do something to distract yourself. Play with your dog. Bake some cookies. Take a walk. I like to go to an amusement park near my house and hit baseballs from a pitching machine when I'm mad or stressed. Smashing something with a bat (that won't get me arrested!) is fun and cathartic. Try it.
I'd spent 6 months telling myself "NO! STOP!!!" every time I started biting and picking at my fingers without even realizing I was doing it before I could really say I quit.
I'll be really happy if anyone here comes back and says something I suggested helped them. :-D
Posted 9 months ago # -
this most recent post to this thread and the previous thread, "This worked for me..." inspired me to give myself a much needed manicure. thanks ladies. going into Tuesday confidently.
Posted 9 months ago # -
I relapsed again, after a very stressful move. But I did go almost 2 months with little to no hand biting/picking. I'm glad to see this site is back up!
I've found that hand lotion helps, so I keep it in various places around the house and in my purse.
And painting my nails helped me the most. I'm not at all a girly-girl, but it still helps.
#1. It forces you to slow down and relax.
#2. It forces you to focus on something other than negative thoughts, stresses, ect..
#3. It provides a nice self-image.
#4. It's a positive distraction.So, basically I look for 'distractions' that fit these descriptions. Making a cup of tea. Play cards...sometimes I'll keep some cards near me, when watching TV, and when I feel an urge I just start shuffling, then deal out solitaire and play if it doesn't go away. :P
Working on a puzzle (though this make cause anxiety for some :) ). Preparing a healthy meal (fruit salad or something). Play guitar. Write a letter. You get the picture.Posted 9 months ago # -
Since I mainly do it alone, being around other people will cause me to stop for awhile. Recently, I took a vacation out of the country and I was always out and about doing things. After a few weeks, my hands started to look normal again! While that made me want to pick the fresh skin, it also made me want to leave them alone to see how normal they'd look after several more weeks. I also wanted to make friends abroad too and didn't want them to get grossed out by my hands, which helped me stop. Since I've come back, however, I've relapsed really bad. My hands are messed up again like they were before and so I'm desperately trying to stop again. I've done before, so I know my hands can heal again.
Posted 7 months ago # -
One of the things that helps me is always keeping a rubber band around my wrist. Whenever I am doing something where my fingers are unoccupied, I play with the rubber band. This helps eliminate some of the picking and biting due to boredom. Unfortunately, it does nothing for me when I am really anxious and hardly realize I am destroying my fingers. Another thing that helps is applying lotion multiple times a day. I think I have accumulated at least six bottles of lotion (I prefer Neutrogena's Norwegian Formula Hand Cream) and have placed them all over my house, in my car, purse, etc. Also, I put Vaseline on my fingers and then put on lotion gloves to wear at night. It really helps to counter any damage I did during the day.
These methods kept my fingers looking good for about two weeks. Unfortunately, I had a major relapse while I took the SAT yesterday. Oh well, time to get back on the horse!
Posted 7 months ago # -
I'm brand new here, but I wanted to say that there are a few thing that have really helped me. I'm not fully there yet, but there are some tools I have been using that, for the first time in 30 years, have been working. (similar to what the previous poster used) I haven't solved the main problem of why I pick or anything, I still have the urge, but I now ALWAYS have with me a little tube of neosporin and lotion for the skin surrounding my fingers and I have cuticle and nail cream and 4-way nail file (it has to include a buffer and polisher) otherwise I will pick at any little nail imperfection, and baby nail clippers to clip off skin pieces that I would normally "pull" at. The goal is to smooth it out enough so I won't pick so much.
I bought a bunch of these in little trial size (and also got some little containers that can slip in a back pocket)and put them in locations (living room, etc) where I pick the most. On the side table in the living room (where I watch TV), on my desk at work (when I'm takin' a breather), in the car (while I'm waiting in traffic), and in the bathroom. In addition to having then at the locations, I always keep these things in my back pocket so I can have quick access to them when I need them like ....I will pick when I'm nervous or at a restaurant with friend (where my hands can be under the table and out of sight).
I have to have them right away because if I can get to them within 10 seconds of my urge to pick, it's all over.
So, it's not like I solved how much I want to pick, but I am able to replace that habit with a new one - smoothing on cuticle and nail cream, filing/buffing off that rough edge of the nail,clipping off the little pieces of dead skin. All of this has finally allowed all but two of my finger to heal and all of my nails are growing and looking normal. I normally would pick my thumb, pointer, and middle fingers plus all of my nails. Now the only thing I am still battling are my thumbs - since were always the most destroyed, allowing them to heal through the scabbing and dry skin is very difficult.
I cannot wear nail polish because nail polish tends to chip and that, for some reason, sets me off to pick on nails and fingers, and basically just undo all my good work, so I choose clear polish with strengthener on occasion, but even then I have to be careful because the gloss can highlight dents, chips and peeling, but I learned not to wear that until I had my "better" habits more ingrained, and so now I am able resist "nail" picking with the clear polish only.
I am so glad I found this site and this forum because even though I've found some tools to stop picking, I am still so interested to find out what the heck is going on, why the need to pick in the first place, and it's great to know I'm not alone.
It is an embarrassing and goofy disorder. I really hate it. I mean I know there are worse problems in life, but it's just one that you'd think should be easy to overcome, but for some reason...it is not at all! But in the meantime, while I figure out how to quiet or solve the urges, these tools at least help redirect the urges.
Thanks for listening.
Posted 6 months ago # -
I've been picking mostly my thumbs since I was a young child. I'm 43 now. I would pick the sides around the nail, the cuticles and the inside of my thumbs as well. Usually until they bled. They have always been a mess and sometimes very painful. I would always keep my thumbs rolled up in a fist or keep my hands in my pocket so no one would see how bad they looked. But like many out here I could not resist doing it! After reading through many of the replies I decided to give the moisturizer a try. Seemed to be the easiest one to start with. I've placed bottles of moisturizer in several places in my house for easy access, my car and my office. So far it is working very well. As long as I keep my hands moist, I have little desire to pick them. Whenever I try to pick, I quickly loose interest as it is not as satisfying or as easy as when the skin is dry. Its been about three weeks since I tried this and my thumbs are looking as normal as I have ever seen them. Its surprising how fast they bounced back. One of the nails is a little "wrinkled" but I think in time that will eventually heal. The best part is that I no longer have to hide my thunmbs from anyone.
If you haven't given this method a try you should think about it.
Posted 5 months ago #
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FingerFreak.com is a community site dedicated to helping people afflicted by compulsive finger picking and other related disorders